Im a celebrity (in mumbai) get me out of here.

Well I am here until November 10th and im already bored of India, I would travel further south but they are having their second monsoon which will make it impossible and also quite difficult to get my flight to Maylasia so I have had to book 2 internal flights so I can get to Trichy to get my flight out of here. I have decided to stay a week in Paloleum (spelling may be wrong) and then go to north Goa and see what is there. Paloleum beach is where they filmed the Bourne Supremacy in 2003 to which they shut it down for 3 days while Matt Damon ran about a bit. It is very busy here and it is not peak season yet (Nov-Feb), the beach is arch shaped and linned with palm trees, if there wasnt so many people this place would be beautiful. Prices here are much higher than Benulim beach which is not good. I may go to the south to find a quieter beach on Tuesday.

It has rained quite a lot since I have been here and the day I go to walk down to the beach I take the brolly and then the sun came out, I was burnt!

Along the beach women try selling you cloth, bangles and other shit and there are droves of them each asking the same questions, where you from? what do you do? I have passed time by amusing myself and serveral other people by coming up with the most random answers e.g. I was from Chille and I was captain of the USS Enterprise or I was from Nepal and a gold smuggler with a perchant for human traffiking or best was I was Gavin from Stockport and I worked for autoglass and would she want me to inject my special resin into her crack ha ha ha ha, she didnt understand that one. The best way is to just 'pretend' to be asleep until someone said "excuse me" (the tag line of the sellers) about 5 times and I then shouted "cant you see that im prettending to be asleep" It was a German girl who wanted the time ha ha ha. I did apologise and explain.

Cows roam the beach and I have seen a few occasions where they decide to just lie on peoples stuff and eat it ha ha ha.

The bus ride here took 2hours and cost 50p where the scenery was amazing.

Not much more to say, see photos below. Or above as they seem to be up there. Looking at the photos they look like what you get when you google paradise.

Chris

Can mice climb?

This was the question I asked myself last night when I heard a noise what can only be described as like the dinosaure from Jurrasic park that spits and looked at the safe and saw a rodentesq creature look at me then scuffle behind it. I thought can mice climb on to my bed and if not I wouldnt be worried but Id be splitting the bill with him. So I thought of my main stream of knowledge and realised according to tv/hollywood they can cook, fly, sail and destroy mansions. Armed with a flip flop I hatched a plan to rid my room of him. Much fun ensured. Alas was not a mouse though but a frog ha.

The photo added at the top is of The Gateway to India in Mumbai if you want the spill on that look it up on wiki.

Above is the slum's / largest contract laundry place in all of Mumbai, these people work from 0400 till sundown in what look like a gruelling job, it also stank of shit.

Below is me at Ghandi's crib! He really didnt know how to live. Oh and I saw Ghandi's flip flops!

Im in Goa now in Bennulim beach, it is a bit wet but still quite warm. I will add photos of Goa at a later date.

Mumbai Goodbye....

Where to start, lets talk about the good, the flight with Jet airways was superb and as luck had it I was seated next to the only other white people on the flight, two blokes from Denmark who liked to drink. I figured this out when they both ordered 4 brandy's each and wine, this was when I figured out that all drinks were free! Needless to say it was one of the best flights ever, well until I woke up.

I am leaving Mumbai 2 days earlier than planned and am heading for Goa on the overnight sleeper train tonight (12 hour journey). Mumbai has such a contrast on one side you have very wealthy living in massive palace type houses and then you have the poorest of the poor with 6 people leaving in 1 room no bigger than an average sized bathroom. They wash and bath in the streets. I stick out like a black man at a KKK gathering and am constantly harrassed by beggers, some with babies some without some with limbs some without and mainly they do nothing to warrent any money, some walk with you for 10 minutes then ask for 60 rupes. Another thing is overcharging for tourists however I dont find this too bad as overcharging it is still remarkably cheap, like a 40 minute cab ride should have been around 90p but I paid $2 (no pound symbol on this keyboard). Driving here is erratic at best, it took me a while to figure out what side of the road they drive on (left), there also seems to be no law with cars doing what ever they like beeping their horns every 5 seconds.

The hotel is pleasant enough but the matress is like sleeping on the floor and the pillows are not of a material known to man yet, probably moon rock. I now wish I took the danes up on their offer of them stealing me the pillows and the blanket provided by the airline.

I have seen all the sights of Mumbai like Ghandi's crib, the slums, the biggest laundrete in whole of mumbai but no Dot Cotton or Mr Apadopolopolus. There was also Jain temple and Hanging gardens where I became somewhat of a celebrity as there was a school (english) trip and once I was spotted I had masses of fans and I can only describe it as being in a really bad boyband like A1 or five. They had pictures taken of me and practised their english which was shit. That has been another problem here as a lot of the people here speak only broken english which proves very difficult. No street signs and with every street looking the same (Imagine Thamesmead but shitter) I can litteraly walk 2 streets away and be lost and have to get a cab back to the hotel.

Food is a whole new chapter, It is like a lottery as you dont know what the food is but unlike the real lottery I am winning, no apple splatters for me. Eating with just the right hand is difficult.

I will try and get some photos on but the speed of their internet is straight out of 1985!


Hoping Goa will be better.